It’s been FOREVERRRRR!!! Ya’ll I have been MIA wayyyy too long. I honestly in full disclosure wasn’t too busy. I really got down on myself for not being happy with the content I could create and just felt that if my content couldn’t be 100% what I would be happy with then I shouldn’t post at all.
Some of you may or may not know that I am Mrs. Texas Regency International and competed for the International crown in Las Vegas this July. If I learned anything from that experience, it was how to deal with disappointment. I really wanted to win ya’ll. I mean obviously we don’t do pageants to lose. But I entered this pageant to win it. I felt good about my chances. I never enter assuming anything but I definitely had a positive mindset.
I didn’t win though. I got first runner up. If you have ever competed in anything you know that being second is a hard place to be because you were ALMOST there. Almost the winner. But not quite. Not quite good enough that time.
But if you try, there’s a lesson in everything so here are a couple things I’ve learned about dealing with disappointment through this experience. So here are three lessons I learned through NOT winning this pageant.
1. It does NOT mean you weren’t enough
This was the hardest to swallow because to me, not winning exactly means I wasn’t good enough. Really though, it just means it wasn’t my year. I did well. I scored high in almost every category, but I did not win. There was a destiny meant for someone else to have that crown this year. But I serve a God who knows all and has a great plan for me and for right now, that meant now winning. It takes great faith to trust that but not being enough is far too extreme an assumption for the lack of crown. I I almost won and that is how I see it now.
2. Being disappointed is okay, being mad is not
This is one of the first times I left a pageant without a crown and yet not sad or mad. I knew I did all I could this year given my circumstances to prepare, and I let that be enough. If we had more money… If my dress cost more… If I hired that person… there are too many if’s that could tell me why I didn’t win. At the end of the day, I did what I could without putting my family in a negative situation. That is all I could do. Is it disappointing not to win? Of course! I set my mind to something and it didn’t happen. However, that is just disappointing. Anger is pointless. There is NO reason to be angry. Who should I blame? The judges? No, they picked the best winner for that day. The winner? No, she deserved to win because she is a sweet, precious person. Myself? Absolutely not. I was the best me possible. You can be the best apple in the bunch but sometimes, they want an orange. That is okay. It’s disappointing but not infuriating.
3. Remember the journey
Disappointment is usually the result of not achieving or getting something we wanted, hoped, or expected to get. That is all that happened. I hoped to win and didn’t. That’s it. But does that discount a year as Mrs. Texas RI? Nope. Does that mean I didn’t have SO MUCH FUN with all the other girls at the pageant? Oh heck no. Ya’ll the journey is everything. We can’t spend so much of life staring at what we want or where we want to be that we miss out on the journey getting there. That’s where memories are made. I don’t remember crowning at the pageant but I DO remember dancing around with my friends. I do remember the fun accents of the United Kingdom contestants. I remember joking with my hair stylist every day. I remember those things. And truth be told, I’d rather remember that. It’s how I want to live my life. The journey isn’t to be missed because we want to get somewhere. You miss everything that way.
Be well, friends.